Above my bed are two large magnificent picture framed skylights. The bedroom faces west and the pitch of the roof angles the skylights ever so slightly more westerly. The afternoon sun, this time of year, can really heat things up in there.
In the evenings I open a few of the bedroom windows. Every once in a while I can hear Jeff’s voice shouting down from heaven, “The air conditioner is on!” But the country cools down at night and more often than not a breeze will blow in carrying delightful night smells and sounds. It’s become a necessity of my existence since moving here, summer or winter, to fall asleep, as well as wake up, in the ambient country air.
As I awoke this morning looking out the skylights I noticed sweet Luna looking back at me. There she was, as she has been for the past few mornings, in her waning motion, sitting high above, peaking in my bedroom to say, “Good Morning.” It isn’t always we have an opportunity to see her moving across a light blue day lit sky, so I laid there enjoying her company.
BabyCat stretched out touching my arm. He turned on his purr even before I began to rub his neck. He reminded me mountain lion came to visit me last night. ~ We were near the fire again. Wearing porcupine’s gift, I wondered if he’d come around too, but it was just mountain lion and me. I wanted to have conversation, receive a message from beyond, even learn mountain lion’s name, surely he has a name. (As frustrating as it is to be lucid in a dream or meditation and not get my way, it is a beautiful thing to be reminded ‘self’ isn’t and shouldn’t always be in control.) Near the fire, wearing my beautiful anklets, I fell asleep next to my large, majestic, strong, yet nameless, animal totem-mountain lion. ~
Opening the kitchen door to let Cadbury out disturbed the song birds. I had caught just a hint of their morning song but as soon as the door opened they silenced, like I had interrupted a sacred choir performance. Once Cadbury stepped outside, a covey of sparrows flew up out of the Sumac bushes outside my kitchen. I had no idea there were so many little birds nesting down in there.
I watered the aging wild flower patch and smiled at noticing a few new California poppies and sunflowers opening up. My smile quickly dwindled as I noticed weeds, more weeds, oh those damn weeds. But something in the smell of the damp earth, changing colors, and morning temperature made me realize I just don’t care about those weeds anymore. Let them have their day. Autumn is coming soon and the earth around me will become like an Etch-a-Sketch shaken by Mother.
Wheeling back into the house, at the threshold was a very big black ant. At first I was going to squish it but then I remembered I had decided (hmm was it me who decided) ant is my insect totem and it is quite unusual to see a black ant near my house. Black ants are rare here and this is the second one I’ve seen this week. Certainly two black ants don’t declare an infestation. Ant looked up at me; I thought how big I must be to it. “Go on ant, shoo, away from the door.”
Rolling through the house, I saw outside to the north, the prayer pouches I had hung with the baby grape vines. The earth around the vines was damp from the irrigation water turned on by a neighbor who knew I wouldn’t get up and go outside late at night to take my water turn. I am grateful for caring, thoughtful neighbors.
I wheeled past my little make shift alter which, sitting on top alongside a few of my cherished spiritual things, are the bottles of elemental oils I had blended a few nights ago. I inhaled deeply and could pick up a hint of patchouli, ginger, lavender essential oils mingling with the smell of a white sage stick. And there also is a set of scriptures. I picked them up opening to a page where I had a little sketch tucked inside. Next to the sketch I had written “Joy ~ is the state of the heart.” I read Hebrews 10:14 “For by one offering He hath perfected forever them that are sanctified.” Putting the scriptures down I decided to go back to bed and watch sweet Luna move across the sky.
In the short distance between my alter and my bed I became distracted. On the other side of my bed I have a painting ‘mess’. There are two projects I have been playing with. In order to get to the other side of the bed, I had to maneuver around a large book and my glasses which must have fallen off the bed last night. I’m surprised the hardbound copy of Seven Spiritual Masterpieces’ by CS Lewis didn’t wake me up when it hit the floor. Looking at the brushes, paints, projects, all I could hear in my head was, “trust the mess.”
I plopped back on my bed to find Luna had already pasted by the skylights. Disappointed, I let out a sigh. “Lord,” I said, “Speak to me today, let me be creative, help me to create, fill me to overflowing with your wonder and magic.”
“Oh, silly wheelchair girl,” He whispered, “Good morning.”