Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Wacky, Wondrous, Whatever Wednesday

"Recently a long lost friend & I had the chance to meet up online. This person once was a dear and special part of my life. I hurt this person and that act has tormented the deepest part of my heart &soul for a very long time. It is inspiring to me how the human heart has the ability to forgive at that deep of level. This person spent their time trying to ease my sorrow & release the deep part of my soul from the regret & sadness that resides there. That degree of forgiveness and kindness motivates me to forgive people I feel have hurt me over what now seems trivial matters. I guess that forgiveness is what I feel is the priceless gift. The ability to forgive ones self to that same degree is a ongoing struggle that so far in life eludes me. I was however reminded why this person was such a special part of my life & I will always be grateful for knowing them." ~ Anonymous
 
Later, Anonymous wrote, "...all of the soul searching for some huge revelation or epiphany, was as simple and as complicated as a single word. Forgiveness..." Anonymous then refers to Don Henley's song The Heart of the Matter, "I think it's about forgiveness...", Anonymous writes, "...so after all of this, I found that in matters of the heart it is JUST the heart that matters, and I found me..."
 
These words and the purity of feeling which emanates from them are deeply, richly, boldly wondrous.
 
Journey of the heart requires boldness, and as we reach one level, in order to progress to another area (if we so choose) a new level of boldness must be achieved. I'm not sure I have that next level of boldness within me, not yet anyway, but because I choose to journey on, it must be summons.

In the pursuit of this 'boldness' there must be a softening of the heart. Softening requires exposure, not full exposure for that is too complicated, too painful, too scary but just enough of a peeling back to view the next leg (oh pardon the pun) of the journey. A peeling back to see the messy pieces and parts of my heart. It's that which begins the softening and softening is ouchy and achy, a real physical ache as the heart is kneaded, conditioned...softened.
 
(In mentoring and life coaching I find many people choose not to journey on but rather want contentment where they are. As you might guess I nudge them to stretch into the 'boldness'.)
 
At my prayer place today the softening commenced and I ache. I pondered Anonymous' words and exposed heart, my own exposing heart and my sorted life...I went to the night of my accident, to the point where I knew I was dying, bleeding to death, to those frantic yet peaceful heart beats, and was reminded what I learned in those moments, reminded of something else Anonymous wrote, the most important thing isn't things, it is love. Love, a simple four letter word holds within itself so much emotion and feeling, including forgiveness.
 
I could write on and on but I believe if you've read this you take it to your heart and there make it matter for you. I do have, however, an affirming after thought, a thought which isn't shared by many life coaches but one I have known from my personal life experience; life is not easy, it's hard, life is really, really hard but when you get down to the heart of the matter, when you peel back the human layers (and in most lives there are a lot of human layers), when you commence with the ache of softening, and begin to expose the rawness of who and what you are, there in is truth and while life is hard, what is true is simple.
 
I inhale deeply and exhale fully. I lovingly place my hand on my heart center, holding your heart, holding Anonymous heart, holding my own heart...with boldness let us journey on and experience what lies at the heart of what matters...forgiveness, love, the simple trues...


 

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